A memory flashed up in my Facebook memories a few days back. A memory from two years ago though I remember the moment as if it was yesterday.

My youngest son was around a month old back then and a trip to Willows activity farm was one of our very first trips out with just me and the boys (daddy was working). I was exhausted , Oliver had cluster fed all night and it had taken us hours to get out the house.

I so wanted to have a lovely day out but the place was packed. I struggled to move the buggy around and was feeling totally overwhelmed.

We hadn't been there very long when I decided to head to the café, I had hoped that by getting there early we could secure a table and I could grab a coffee before Oliver needed feeding.

However no sooner had we grabbed a table and Oliver started to cry, he needing feeding. I was still a bit self conscious about feeding in public. I wasnt able to feed my eldest, he had a tongue tie and just wouldnt latch so I had pumped excusively for him for a year. I pulled out my breast feeding shawl and promised Jacob that i would get him a drink in a moment as soon as Oliver had finished. But of course he was in it for the long haul, this wasnt to be a quick feed. And I panicked. The queue grew longer and longer and Jacob grew grumpier and grumpier.

A family had sat at the table next to us and a kind grandmother looked over at me on the brink of tears and smiled. She must have heard me say that I would get him a drink and me a coffee in a moment. She must have heard me repeat it several times. 

Jacob was on the brink of a full on meltdown and Oliver was showing no sings of detaching himself from me anytime soon.

That was it , first trip out as a trio and I had failed. I felt utterly defeated and tired and sore and everything in between.

Just then the kind grandmother from earlier plonked a large coffee and a squash for Jacob on the table in front of us, along with a cookie. I looked up confused , she smiled, rubbed my sholder and said "Keep going Mama, you are doing a great job!" I managed to stutter thank you through the tears and then she left.

Dear kind lady in Willows farm, you will never know how much your kindness meant to me that day. How much I needed to hear that I was doing a good job and how I would repeat your words to myself anytime I was in the sort of sitaution again (and there were numerous.)

I drank my coffee, Jacob was happy with his cookie and squash and Oliver finally finished feeding and fell into a deep sleep. We had a lovely day, I didnt give up and we ended up having the best day. I never found you to say thank you properly, but two years on I still remember the kindess you showed me that day.

About a year later in Van Hage I observed a Mama in a similar predicament and so I paid it forward , brought her a coffee and a drink for her children and told her she was doing a great job. She was. You will never know how your words kept me going that day. But thank you, a thousand times thank you.

I've been reading Giovanna Fletchers new book "Letters on Motherhood" and in her words "Words are powerful. Please use yours to encourage, support and empower those who deserve it".

To the Kind Lady in Willows Activity Farm, you made a difference, I will remember you always.

Love

Kayleigh & The Boys

XxxX